Cold Reading Summary (C9): Hypnotic Techniques

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Cold reading is essentially describing the real-time thoughts and feelings your target (the person you are cold reading) is having based on the real thoughts and feelings you had while having a similar experience in the past. 

That experience could be almost anything. It could be happy (getting a gift, seeing an old friend, achieving something), sad (the death of a loved one, a broken heart), or anything else.

You use journaling to tap into your thoughts and feelings, so that when the opportunity arises, you will be equipped to relay them to your target.

Since your target doesn’t know you have put so much prior preparation into this, or that almost everyone thinks and feels similar things when having similar experiences, it will seem as though you have incredible insight and connection with the target.

Ideally, by the end of the cold reading, you want your target to be feeling good, or at least better than they did before.

Usually, when we pause while speaking, it’s because we are taking a breath or waiting for a reaction, such as a laugh or nod of agreement.

A much better way to use pauses is to put them just before finishing a thought, preferably between transitive verb and object. Use them with the main ideas, those that you want to convey are important to you.

*A transitive verb is a verb that requires a direct object to complete its meaning.

For example, "kick," "give," and "build" are transitive verbs, but "sleep," "exist," and "come" are not since they do not need a direct object to convey a complete thought.

Here’s an example, using (P) to represent a pause.

I’m getting a feeling that you’re worried about (P) ordering the wrong thing. That you’re afraid if the waitress comes over you might order (P) something you don’t really want just to avoid (P) being embarrassed.

When you pause, act like you are searching in your mind. Like you are thinking carefully about how to articulate your insight. Break eye contact, turn your head slightly, and use the time to maximize your own feeling so you can deliver your statements with emotional congruence.

It’s important to ensure they don’t view your cold reading as a criticism of their deepest thoughts. Expanding on the previous, you should say something like this:

Please take as long as you need to order. I only knew what I wanted because I’ve been here before and I always get the same thing.

Being able to effectively place pauses during a cold read takes a lot of practice.

Here is a list of transitive verbs. Use them in a sentence (make up your own sentences) and pause between the verb and the object.

• Give - "He gave you (P) a look of despair."

• Show - "You showed him (P) your true feelings."

• Tell - "You told them (P) you were sorry."

• Bring - "They brought you (P) the very thing you wanted."

• Send - "They sent you (P) an email."

• Make - "You made her (P) her favorite dinner."

• Choose - "He chose (P) the thing you wanted."

• Write - "You wrote down (P) your deepest thoughts."

• Study - "She studied (P) your every move."

• Teach - "He taught you (P) how to love."

• Drop - "He dropped (P) the news onto you."

• Throw - "She threw away (P) your friendship."

• Catch - "He caught you (P) in the act."

• List - "They listed (P) all the things that bothered them."

Now go and practice using pauses in real conversations. Start with close friends and family. Once you get the hang of it, use them while cold reading targets.

Read the next chapter here.

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